The rotten vision of present

Hard to describe what is in me here.

At capital in the cab, drifting into the neon light through darkness here.
The feeling flies back.
Everything seems to be too fast.
On the turbo jet.
As higher expectation comes higher perfection, old habit dies hard. I say.
Still, the crack that ready to break apart is still not so ever can.
Not the outside.
It's eating inside here.

You are here aiming for what you convinced to yourself by yourself of what matters to oneself. I don't know what is much worst, to convince the others or to convince your own self.

There, not that far from you, I see lives that hunger for necessities to survive.
To live. To get pass the day of fear and question of will there be sunlight on them tomorrow.
It's not as in the lyric, not as in any written forms.
It's just there. Lives! Living creatures there.
The dryness of the drought can't compare to the thirst of living.
They are struggling to survive.
At one point, i do feel that.
At one point, butterflies are all in my stomach.
At one point, everything hurls up inside, dying to burst out.
Too dry, too mess-up, too risky, too sick!

Here you are aiming for what matters in life.
You are lucky if you are still aiming and you have still some matters to your life.

and the song goes...
'Yael Naim - Far Far'

Far far, there's this little girl
she was praying for something to happen to her
everyday she writes words and more words
just to spit out the thoughts that keep floating inside
and she's strong when the dreams come cos' they
take her, cover her, they are all over
the reality looks far now, but don't go

How can you stay outside?
there's a beautiful mess inside
how can you stay outside?
there's a beautiful mess inside
oh oh oh oh

Far far, there's this little girl
she was praying for something good to happen to her
from time to time there are colors and shapes
dazzling her eyes, tickling her hands
they invent her a new world with
oil skies and aquarel rivers
but don't you run away already
please don't go oh oh


And the she sings..
'How can you stay outside when there is the pitiful mess inside?'

....
xox